How it all changes.

Sometimes, our world falls apart. Everything at the same time and you have nothing left. You know the days, when everythings feels hopeless and you're trying to figure out how to make the best decision. How to make someone believe in you. Or even to make yourself believe in you. When you have everybody by your side, but it feels like you have no one. 
I know a person who feels like this right now. And I am trying to make her feel better. Trying to give love. With hugs. Words. But it can be so hard to try to comfort someone who has the worst time of their lives. And when everything dies. Everyone dies. And even the ones who live the most, they die. 

You know Ami. Our new familymember. She has spent almost one year here with us. We all are family here now. But I am still waiting for her to come home. I finished work at 2 a clock today, but she's still not here. She should be home by this time. Should sit with me here in the couch and tell me about her day. About what she will do tomorrow. We should sit here and eat youghurt together, in this moment. But we left her at the airport yesterday and now she's going back to her life in Italy. I still can't believe that she won't come home today. Her home is here. She lives here. She's with us now.

And John, he went to Berlin early this morning. He's there with Erik and I am sure that they have a great time. But I want to have him here. Wake up with him. It was so sad to wake up this morning without him. Knowing that I won't meet him for a while. And I realized that there is so much I want to talk with him about after one day. I have so much to tell about how it was at work, new opinions and thoughts about things that I got today. But he's not here. And I will have to wake up alone for a while now. That sucks. But I am sure that he's having a great time, and I wish him all the happiness I can give.

Tittit, Rolf, Alva and me have been drinking some wine tonight, and have eaten really tasty food. It was a great evening and we spoke about everything from heaven to earth. I am to thankful for everything that happens in my life, and for all the opportunities I get. I am looking forward to a good day tomorrow, filled with sun and work and love and smiles. 

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